Four trick questions that women love to ask men - and their answers.
What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrect (i.e. tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.
1. What are you thinking about?
The proper answer to this, of course, is "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are and how lucky I am to have met you."
Inappropriate answers:
a. Your younger sister, how much prettier she is than you
b. I was wondering if you ever shut up?
d.. Football
e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.
2. Do you love me?
The proper response is "YES!", or if you feel a more detailed answer is in order "Yes, dear".
Inappropriate responses include:
a. I suppose so.
b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
c. That depends on what you mean by love. (
d. Does it matter?
e. Who, me?
3. Do I look fat?
The correct answer is an emphatic "Of course not!"
Incorrect:
a. Compared to what?
b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're thighs sure do make a lot of noise.
c. A little extra weight looks good on you.
d. I've seen fatter.
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
4. Do you think she's prettier than me?
Once again, the proper response is an emphatic "Of course not!"
Incorrect responses:
a. Yes, but you have a better personality.
b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner.
c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age.
d. Define pretty.
e. Could you repeat the question, I was thinking of the insurance money again.
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