MY KIND OF POLICE FORCE

Florida’s got it right. Bravo for Sheriff Judd!!!
A good answer.
As reported earlier this week, some dirtbag who got pulled over
in a routine traffic stop in Florida ended up “executing”
the deputy who stopped him. The deputy was shot eight times,
including once behind his right ear at close range.
Another deputy was wounded and a police dog killed.
A statewide manhunt ensued.
The low-life was found hiding in a wooded area with his gun.
SWAT team officers fired and hit the guy 68 times.
Now here’s the kicker:
Naturally, the media asked why they shot him 68 times.
Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd, told the Orlando Sentinel -
“That’s all the bullets we had.”
(Talk about an all time classic answer!!!)

HOLIDAY IN AUSTRALIA

Oh my God!!!!

READ THE TEXT FIRST

then look at the pick…….

Family on holiday in Australia for a week and a half when husband, wife and their 15 year old son decided to go scuba diving. The husband is in the navy and has had some scuba experience. His son wanted a pic of his mum and dad in all their gear so got the
underwater camera on the go. When it came to taking the pic the dad realized that the son look like he was panicking as he took it and the “OK” hand sign to see if he was alright.The son took the pic and swam to the surface and back to the boat as quick as he could so the mum and dad followed to see if he was OK.they got back to him he was scrambling onto the boat and absolutely shitting himself. When the parents asked why he said “there was a shark behind you” the dad thought he was joking but the skipper of the boat said it was true and that they wouldn’t believe him if he told them what it was. As soon as they got back to the hotel they put the pic onto the laptop this is what they saw.
Try and tell me you wouldn’t have emptied your entire digestive right at the point you saw it and would you have stayed to take the picture??

CORRECT PARKERS NEAR EXTINCTION.....

DRIVERS who can position their car in the middle of a parking space at a supermarket are sliding closer to extinction, conservationists have warned.

Yet another symptom of climate change? Or is he just an unspeakable bastard who deserves to die?

Research teams have recorded a sharp decline in numbers over the last decade, despite strenuous efforts to educate the public about how easy it is to just put your fucking car in the middle of a parking space.

Dr Tom Logan, head of species protection at the WWF, said: "There is a series of white lines separated by spaces roughly the same width as a car, plus a little bit more. Let's think of that as the first Great Big Fucking Clue shall we?

"As we approach, we then have to ask ourselves: 'do I park on the white line, do I straddle the white line or do I get my huge, chocolate-covered face out of my fat, greedy, unwashed arse and just put the fucking car in the middle of the fucking space?'"

Conservationists have blamed the crisis on a combination of poaching, loss of habitat and an unbelievable fucking selfishness by a bunch of total and complete bastards who deserve to die on a spike.

"There are now less than 50 people in the UK who are able to do this," said Dr Logan. "That's not just a tragedy for our planet, it's doing my fucking head in every time I go to Homebase."

WWF warned that drivers who can park in the middle of a space will soon share the fate of people who knew not to park four feet from the fucking kerb, extinct since 1993.

Dr Logan added: "A fucking mountain gorilla could do this with its fucking eyes shut, but for some reason the average British motorist seems to think every car park in the world was made just for them.

"Or maybe they've heard that if they park on the white line Graham fucking Norton is going to jump out from behind a bottle-bank and send them on holiday to Orlando.

"Anyway, the point is we need more money."